Friday, October 10, 2008

Asymmetric Limbz: Accessorize Your Hemi

Dear WasteManagement,
Now that everyone is jumping on the Asymmetric Limbz bandwagon what can I do to make my hemi UNIQUE?

(In case you missed it/live in a red state/have no eyes, Steve is referring to the hot new fashion trend Xposed this week in a Beezies & Bankrolls XCLUSIVE.)

The first thing I would suggest is steroids. Make your hemi the biggest, baddest, most-contrasting-with-your-other-limpdick-arm hemi on your particular block in Brooklyn/Silverlake/The Mission/Austin. If you're a pussdog, then here are some other wayz to ACCESSORIZE YOUR HEMI:


"The Bowling Arm" is made from recycled cricket balls, so you can feel good about your GRN hemi.

Notice this babe showing off her handsome The Bowling Arm while working out her hemi simply by resting her heavy head (laden with deep thoughts about the frozen c(red)it market) on it.


Holy god damn it! This 100% SAVAGE shows off his hemi with a BEAR showing off HIS hemi. Totally self-reflexive, totally sicko.

This guy totally doesn't understand irony. Obvi, everybody with a HEMI hearts THE DUDE, but you can't be all fanboy gay about your love of Lebowski, not cool.



Obvi, ethnic booty (even AZN) can compliment a hemi like earthworms in a garden (do ya'll compost?).


This babe is a double threat. The square grid pattern on her dress help us to clearly see the angle of her swagger. Holding her bowling bag with her hemi, this babe is seriously heavy on the right. Obvi when one side of your body is heavier than the other it's only natural to LEAN and GET YOUR SWAGGER RIGHT.

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